Saturday, July 21, 2007

"eternal postponements" and little gold fishes

Last weekend I finished reading my first novel by Columbian author and Nobel Prize winner Gabriel Garcia Marquez. I know, should have read him earlier. So little time in this life for art, unfortunately. Maybe that's what retirement is for.

Anyway, there's a couple of lines and phrases in One Hundred Years of Solitude (I don't know how to underline yet in this blog), that reminded me so much of what this 5+ year IRS ultramarathon quest has been like.

This scene is about one of the main characters, Colonel Aureliano Buendia, who has finished a long war:

"With them he waged the sad war of daily humiliation, of entreaties and petitions, of come-back tomorrow, of any-time-now, of we're-studying-your-case-with-the-proper-attention; the ware hopelessly lost against the many yours-most-trulys.... the other war, the bloody one of twenty years, did not cause them as much damage as the corrosive war of eternal postponements."

In time it took to get divorced and get through the IRS audit, tax collection and innocent spouse circus (which isn't even over yet), I trained for and finished three marathons, took prep courses and completed an ADN and get my RN license, trained as an ICU nurse, and - had a baby.

As cheapstreet said in a message posting: "I think many people are so very afraid of doing anything wrong because they are so 'invested' in their lives. With the cars, the houses and their net worth tied up in 'currency of normalcy' that they do not even want to think of how close they are to it all falling apart. Don't want to think of how they too could be caught in the gears of the tabulating machine of the IRS..."

A currency of normalcy - my life has been anything but. My fiscal life is owned by others, or I should say in the care of others. How's that for losing your independence.

Or, as I think of it at other times, it's complete freedom.

Either way, I was one of those people afraid of doing anything wrong - so afraid I thought I'd be a tax cheat if I didn't say my ex was cheating and dragging me into it.

So, to remain and silent, and maybe complicit, or speak up and end up here. Either way, it's life I guess. How else can you put it. Trick is to not end up shut up in a little room making little gold fishes, bitter and stuck in solitude, for the rest of my life. That's what happened to Colonel Aureliano...in One Hundred Years of Solitude. Good book. I recommend it.
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1 comment:

cheapstreet said...

See Sicko if you have not yet seen it. He mentions how we as a country are afraid of stepping out of line...you no longer need fear that...

July 21, 2007 at 10:14 PM

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Mission impossible

Mark Everson, commissioner of the IRS, states in a message to taxpayers, "To protect the honest taxpayer, we have strengthened enforcement of the tax laws. The vast majority of taxpayers pay honestly and accurately, and they have every right to expect their neighbors and competitors to do the same."

This blog will document my ongoing efforts to extract myself from the financially oppressive control of the IRS during and after being married to a businessman who was less than forthright with his finances. Here's what happened when I tried to be honest and make things right. A little upfront warning: don't try this at home. You'll end up where I am, and believe me, it's tedious at best.

The IRS Mission, according to the 2006 1040 instruction booklet, is, "Provide America's taxpayers top quality service by helping them understand and meet their tax responsiblities and by applying the tax law with integrity and fairness to all."

My Mission: In dealing with the IRS since a joint-income tax return field audit was started in July 2002, I hope to help as many friends as possible, in like circumstances, avoid the "top quality service" of such a fair and honest organization as the IRS. It's not worth it. Don't ever try to be a good American in this realm. Protect yourself.